The Carli Project... What Do I See?

Oh time... where do you go? Life has been so busy lately! It has been quite some time since I have blogged and I have so much to share. I have been busy in such a good way and I wouldn't have it any other way.

The other day I received a text from my mom, a text that has left me thinking for the past week about my life and what I am accomplishing in my life. This text stated that my mom had just ran into my ex's mother. Now, I am not one to talk about my past relationships in forums like this. I feel like that relationship is one I learned a lot from and am more grateful for the things I learned and the pain I went through, then being sad that it ended. So, when I received this text I immediately called my mom to not ask for info she received, but to ask what info was shared about me. The info that was shared was exactly what I want people to know about me, what I hope people who interact with me see in me.

My weight loss/healthier life journey has been the most amazing thing to happen to me. I have had so much joy and happiness brought into my life in the last few months. I have truly grown to love myself and most importantly I am learning to love my life! This is exactly what was shared by my mom, I am loving my life! My life is better than I could ask for and I am so grateful for the time I have to make myself the best me! I am loving where I live, my roommate, my landlord, and my ward. I am loving my job so much right now! I am excited to start school again and grow my knowledge. I am loving the time I get to spend with my family and friends, the time I get to make our relationships richer and deeper. I am loving the chance I get to become healthier and to really see myself conquering a thing I feared I could never do. It is kind of silly how powerful I feel because I have been conquering this struggle in my life, but I am so dang proud of myself! I am my biggest cheerleader... and that is my secret to success... I am cheering myself on every single moment!

So... how is my journey going? Well... I am glad you asked! I am doing so well! I reached a great milestone today! I am officially under 250 lbs and have lost over 33 lbs since the beginning of March. I feel the lifestyle change I am trying to achieve happening. I am back to running and boy did I miss it! I had to take some time off due to an IT band injury. I am loving the "runner's high" so much! When I run, I feel as though I have just had a free therapy session because it is so mind clearing. I am just feeling so much more like a live everyday to its fullest person, versus the person that is living day to day. I know I will hit my bumps in the road, but I am ready to hit them, I have planned my attacks when they hit. I am just loving my journey!

Life is so good! I am so happy and I just love it! I am living a life that others in my life never had an opportunity to live, so maybe I feel as though I need to live it to the fullest for them. I am okay with not being married and having kids right now... I love that I have grown to love myself so much! This will only benefit me in my future relationships. My time will come... I am not the typical LDS girl this way... I am not dying to get married. I know that a husband and children will bring me lots of joy in my life, but it is not the only source of happiness in the world. I am enjoying all the happiness life has to offer me now. OK... I guess I am getting a little carried away... so I will end my rant now. I am just loving life so much and I just really wanted to share that joy with you!

Til next time!

Who do I depend on?

I have been pondering lately on why I have chosen to take this path again. I do not question why I am doing this, that has been made very clear to me and I am beyond ready to make the changes that are necessary for me to live a long, healthy life. The question I tend to ponder... Why I am I taking this path alone this time? Last time I joined WW, it was on the spur of the moment, I don't even think I knew I was going to do it the night before. My mom, sister and grandma were joining and I just thought I would give WW a try. Funny thing was, I was the one who ended up staying the longest out of us four. I loved going with them, but I also loved going on my own. I really learned that I can be just as much of a support and pusher on myself than that of others. I am truly my biggest critic, but I am also my biggest supporter. If anyone knows what I am truly capable, it is me!

 

Well here I am, attending meetings by myself again. I am truly finding my power of control again. Has this been an easy transition for me? NO WAY!!! I am having more struggles this time and I am truly finding it hard to readjust to this lifestyle, but I also am remembering that I will not wake up changed because I want to. I will have to work hard and it will take time, but it will come. One of the reasons I chose WW was the basis that you are not dieting, but making a lifestyle change. I have really tried to make this clear to others... I am not limited on what foods I can eat, everything is an option, but I may choose to pass up one indulgence so that I may indulge in something I would enjoy more. Let me say it one more time... I am not on a diet!!!

I am learning quickly how much I have to depend on myself. I am the only one who can make the changes in my life. You cannot tell me to go and exercise after work or to not eat that extra slice of pizza that night. It simply does not work that way. As I mentioned earlier, I am learning more about finding my power of control lately, just in myself. I am the only one who can truly tell myself that walking around the block instead of a nap is a better choice. I am the only one that can say that I need to pass on the candy bowl at work and that the candy is SO not worth the points.

I know this journey is truly one that I will take on my own, with the support of others behind me. I know that I am truly the only one in control of myself and my choices. I am going to do this and I am going to become a healthier person because of it.

In other news... I reached my first weight loss goal today! I have officially lost over 10 lbs as of today! (I can't reveal my real number yet... I am in a biggest loser competition and don't want my competitors to feel bad ;)) I was very excited to see that number hit, especially since I have felt like crap this week.

Til next time!!!

The Reality of What I Saw and Feared...

Here I am, joining the blogging world again... but this is not what I anticipated blogging about. I had actually given up on blogging and really felt no importance of keeping it up. I do feel as though I do not want to share everything that happens in my life in such a public forum, I have private accounts and ways of sharing with my family and friends about my personal life. I am returning to the blogging world for a more important reason, and I secretly hope this reason will not only be inspiring to me, but to others as well.

A little over a year ago I was faced with some big bumps in the road. I don't feel it necessary to share all the details, but my life was pretty much flipped upside down. Everything I thought was going to happen didn't, the things I never expected to happen did. I really struggled... I had felt as though I was living the phrase "when it rains, it pours" to more than its fullest. Well, with all of the things happening in my life, I had a lot of stress in my life! What happens when you have a lot of stress in your life? Well let me show you how I dealt with my stress. 

 

This is me about 2 years ago.

Here are some recent pictures of me within the last few months.

 Well folks, I sure did undo all my hard work and effort I put forth to lose weight and become healthier. I gained all the weight I had lost back, plus more.

 

 I have had some big reality checks in my life lately and I know I need to make some drastic changes in my life now! I have noticed simple things like my energy level and ambition diminish lately. I feared being diagnosed with scary things like diabetes or hypertension. I have noticed a great increase in my GERD/acid reflux. Also, my big scare moment was stepping on a scale and seeing a number I had never seen in my entire life... 281.8 lbs... that is the heaviest I have ever been. Most of all, I just don't feel like myself!

 

I have decided to join Weight Watchers again, as I know that this program works for me. I lost close to 50 pounds before I quit last time. I am excited to start this program again! I know that it is a doable program and there is so much to benefit from it. I was recently talking to my doctor about weight loss and she was really emphasizing on picking something that would focus more on losing around 2 pound a week. The point being that if you lose it at that rate, you are making lifestyle changes that are doable and livable for more than a short amount of time. It is also healthier for you. Weight Watchers is meant to lose at this rate, they have the same beliefs as my doctor on losing it and keeping it off.

 

*Note: this is the program that works best for me. I am not saying this is the program for everyone and that Weight Watchers is the only program that works. This is the program I am using along with help from other bloggers and medical professionals. This being said, most of this blog will focus on my journey through Weight Watchers. I encourage those joining my journey to do what works best for them, I want to see success in you!

 

I will be updating this blog with my journey to a healthier me, truly becoming someone I never thought I could be. I have never been able to truly picture myself as a skinnier and healthier girl. I cannot wait to help inspire myself and others along this journey!

A Quarter of a Century Already???

Oh my goodness!!! I have been one good slacker on the blog end of life, but I guess my life has been busy! Oh the things I need to share... I have had such an amazing transformation in life... and I felt so inspired to share! So hopefully, I will have more time to share and write down my experiences. For now... it is my 25th birthday, which means... you get to learn 25 random facts about me! So here we go...

1. This year I am officially half my Dad's age! It's crazy to think that my Dad was my age when he had his first child! Shhh... don't tell him I revealed his age!
2. My favorite movie of all times is "10 Things I Hate About You!" I love Heath Ledger and Julia Stiles... I cried the day Heath died... he is an amazing actor!
3. I was the first kiss for the guy who gave me my first kiss... we were inexperienced together, and it makes for a great story! Oh, we were also 24 and 26... so no young love on the playground!
4. I am super excited to be the maid of honor for my best friend and cousin, Clarissa! I love her to death! We have the best times together and I cannot wait to see her marry Joe... they are so happy together!
5. I have started a bucket list and am striving to check things off. I was able to check a big item off by overcoming a fear of mine! I also look forward to adding another check when I see Air Supply with my amazing best friend Melanie!
6. I am becoming more and more obsessed with nail polish... I am finding that when I have painted finger nails, the kids at work, especially the girls, tend to enjoy it and warm up to me more!
7. I have always been a pickier eater and have really struggled with certain foods, but as I have gotten older and lived on my own, I have learned to tolerate certain foods I use to hate!
8. I have recently obsessed with the show "The Vampire Diaries!" I am so sucked in that I watched 3 seasons in just over a month... which is a lot for the girl who rarely watched TV shows!
9. I used to live in the apartment right next to my best friend, Melanie! I loved it and miss it so much! What an amazing experience that was... She is an amazing friend!
10. My whole view and focus with the gospel has been deepened so much the last few months! My testimony is amazing and I can really say that I am truly grateful for the trials that bombarded my life, for without them, my life would have never changed in this way!
11. I now officially reside in Murray... and I love it! Newer apartments with nicer amenities are always a plus to move into!
12. As much as I love my job and the joy I receive from taking care of sick children, I have decided that I no longer want to be a RN. I see where the healthcare field is heading the next few years, and I do not want to be permanently stuck in this field!
13. A crazy little quirk about me? All the clothes in my closet must face the same way and certain clothes go on certain hangers... it will bug me if anything is differed!
14. My curio cabinet is half full of Kasey Kahne items, like cars and figurines! Can we say that I like Kasey? He is one fine man!!!
15. My favorite feature of my face is my eyes! I love the color they have, and it seems to change from time to time!
16. I have colored my hair back to my natural color, but I continue to color it because I, at the ripe old age of 25, have grey hairs! I have had them since I was 21!
17. I hate scary movies! I do not do well with suspense... I remember seeing "The Grudge" in high school and not being able to sleep for days!
18. I get red easily... get me giggling and my face goes bright red! I also turn red when stressed or mad!
19. I am not a good liar... I always give away my lies by laughing or just spitting out the truth! I have always had a problem with liars and never liked them, probably the reason why I am not a good liar!
20. The greatest fear I overcame? Guns! I have always been afraid of guns, especially the loud noises they make! Now... I love to shoot and can't wait to go out again!
21. I still sleep on a twin bed... and no I don't enjoy it! One day, hopefully sooner than later, I will own a nice, comfy queen bed!
22. I am very possessive of my pens! As most people in the healthcare field can attest... pens are a necessary item and if left unsupervised... they can disappear quickly!
23. I play Bunco with a group of awesome ladies every month... this is probably the night I get the loudest and craziest! I have had so many moments of full on laughs that I love!
24. I bought a smart phone this last year for the first time... I don't know how I lived without one for so long! I love it so much!!!
25. I have grown to love holidays, especially Christmas! I love to decorate and get in the spirit!

There you have it! 25 more random facts about me! I will strive harder to be better at blogging! Life is going so well! I know too... that it will get better!

I Really Need To Be Better At This... Salt Lake Is Sucking Me In!!!

Ok... so apparently I am becoming an utter failure at blogging! I was doing so good and then I moved and didn't have access to the internet and then I move and have access but still can't kick my butt in gear to blog again! I really need to, since I struggle to write in a journal, I need to blog more to have at least something similar to a journal. So... here I go... attempt number (unknown)! Life has been so crazy lately! Which I guess is a good thing because I am becoming quite the social butterfly! For those of you that do not know, I moved out on my own last November. I first moved to a cute little townhouse in Magna and shared it with two girls, then in May, I had the opportunity to move a lot closer to work. So here I am, a resident of good ol' Salt Lake City! I love living in SLC!!! I am so close to work, fun and much more! I love my apartment to death... I live in a 2 bedroom apartment and share it with my awesome roommate Kamie! To answer the question of how we know each other... we worked together at IMC on the Maternity Unit for a few months... it has been a long time since we worked together, but I am so excited to have her join me in SLC! I really feel that Salt Lake is the place for me! I have felt ok in other places, but I have felt so much at home here... I really don't picture myself anywhere else. Here are some pics of my cute little apartment... that I just love!!!

This is the dining area that is just off of the living room and kitchen!

This is the living room... it looks super bare, but this is an older picture.  Now we have a treadmill, dvd's and a newer television there.

This is the kitchen, excuse the pile of dishes there! We have no dishwasher, so we wash everything by hand, which really isn't that bad!

Another shot of the kitchen... I love it! The kitchen I had in Magna was probably half this size, so I enjoy this one much more! I can actually cook and have counters to do so!

The bathroom, it's smaller, but I would have this small bathroom any day  if it included the next photo!

The vanity, my favorite part of the apt!!! I can get ready while someone is in the shower and vice versa... this area is pretty spacious as well!

My bedroom, this is a horrible shot. I don't think you can see how big my room really is from here. I can lay on the floor on both sides of my bed comfortably.

My walk-in closet... this is a close 2nd in favorite spots! I love it! As you can see... I store a lot of stuff in there because it is so big!

There you go... my sweet little abode in Salt Lake! I love living here! I am on my own and independent, which is such an amazing feeling! I feel so blessed to have the opportunity to have myself established and on my own!

I Am Back!!! And... I Have 24 Random Facts For You!!!

Well, we meet again! It has been far too long since I have posted on here! Now that I have the internet, I am back in action, ready to blog again! So I thought I would give you another glimpse into my life, by giving you 24 random facts about me. Today is my 24th Birthday, man I am getting old! LOL... no I am enjoying my life... It sure is amazing! I have many things that have happened in the last few months that I am going to be sharing on here... so stay tuned!!! I think they are amazing things to share! Ok... so on with the 24 facts!

1. I have lived in three different locations in the past year, but I am thinking that where I am now, it the best so far!
2. I accomplished my first big sewing project on my own this year. I made a car seat canopy and blanket for my nephew that is adopted out. And must I say, on a biased note, that it is adorable!
3. I am now working up at Primary Children's Medical Center on the Rapid Treatment Unit! I love working with kids... they are awesome, but there are times I come home thinking to myself... I think I just got some free, non-chemical birth control today!
4. I have finished all my pre-reqs for Nursing School and have been patiently and hard workingly waiting to get into a program so I can be an RN!
5. I used to be the girl that could sleep in all time... not wake up till 10 or 11am, but now my body wakes me up by 8:30am most days!
6. I have self diagnosed myself with OCD at times... One of my crazy little quirks? When I make my bed, or anybody's bed actually... it is made with hospital corners, I think it makes the bed look a lot neater.
7. I get cold easily... I am usually wrapped in a blanket at home and love it!
8. I am a music snob at times... I really hate it when the bands I like go big! I hate when a musician can no longer be as personal with their fans, as when they were smaller and less known!
9. I went on my first trip alone this past year... I went to Alabama to visit my cousin and her adorable family! I loved every minute of it and want to go back so bad!
10. I have become pretty active in life and love to run! Which, I never thought I would enjoy! I have a goal to run a complete 5k this year!
11. I moved out on my own in November... and it has been the best thing! I truly love my indepence and appreciate my parents that much more!
12. I have a favorite brother and a favorite sister... and they know who they are! I guess since I only have one a piece... I am kind of forced to pick favorites!
13. I have truly learned throughout life and the trials I have been given, that a positive attitude makes all the difference! I strive to keep a positive attitude as much as possible.
14. I love jewelry and have learned to make a ton of things myself! I haven't bought jewelry for a couple of years now, because it is so much cheaper to make!
15. I have never broken a bone in my life!!! I am clumsy, but just not enough to get more than bumps and bruises from.
16. I love the $5 movie bin at Wal-Mart! I have become a movie buff and have found many treasures there!
17. I ride TRAX to work a lot... I used to be afraid of riding it, because I thought there were a lot of bums on there, but I was wrong, and I save a ton of gas riding it!
18. I am an avid couponer! I have a coupon binder and everything! I love watching the total go down as they scan my coupons in... it's very rewarding!
19. I have been a CNA for six years now... yes, I said six! It is a long time, but I have learned so much from being a CNA, that will be super helpful to know as an RN. I just know that I in due time, when it is suppose to happen, I will get into Nursing School.
20. I used to always have sound going on in the background, but I have learned to enjoy the peace and quite sometimes! I love just sitting and listening to all the natural sounds around me.
21. I have already picked out a reward for when I hit my goal and achieve my lifetime at Weight Watchers, I am going to buy a whole new wardrobe... with lots of fun cute clothes!
22. I am slowly becoming a little more green and earth friendly... I am not a freak, but I love to do my part to make the world a little more green and to continue it's beauty.
23. I have lived in Utah my whole life, but have never been skiing or snowboarding! I hope to one day learn to do one of these!
24. I have become very proud of my sister! And now she is my hero! I look up to her with amazement as I have seen her place a baby for adoption. She is AMAZING !!! I will post about this later, but she is a true example of a miraculous women!

There you have it! You now know 24 random facts about me! I can't wait to share more of my life, now that I have internet access! So stay tuned!

Computer Problems... GRRR...!!!

So I want to apologize for not posting yesterday. I am really trying to blog every Sunday night, but the internet on my computer is down and I cannot download any pictures. For my post I would love to put up pictures to help tell of the great adventures I had this week. So please forgive me and stay tuned for an updated blog post as soon as my computer works. In the meantime... let me give you an update on my weight loss.

The Shrinking of Carli
The last couple of weeks have been really quite well! I am finally feeling like I am back in the mindset of losing weight. I feel like it is something I can truly accomplish in a visible point in time. I am feeling the affects that it has truly had on my mood and attitude. It is funny to think that when I eat healthier and more strick... I tend to be in a better mood. Then the days I don't care about what I eat tend to be my bad days. I love this feeling because I want to strive to have a good mood and have now found one factor to help improve my mood. Well not much else to tell you... but here are my weekly totals.

Week 23- I lost a total of 0.8 lbs this week. My total lost so far is 31.6 lbs!
Week 24- I lost a total of 1.6 lbs this week. My total lost so far is 33.2 lbs!